Eyes Open
10/16/14 
Brian Yoo
College: The United States Naval Academy, Annapolis, MD
Sophomore
God reveals himself to each of us in a unique and special way. This is how he revealed himself to me and led me to the path I am on now. I am a currently second year Midshipman at the United States Naval Academy. But, the journey to here and now began many years ago and against all odds. Where I am today is what some have called impossible. What I learned through this journey, however, is that what is possible and impossible or realistic or unrealistic is beyond our humanly conception, and that God blesses us with the strength and the tools to pursue what he has planned for us.
My first exposure to the Naval Academy was during the summer before entering high school. I was invited to attend the Navy Seal Training Camp, an intense summer wrestling camp at the Naval Academy, by Coach Brian Antonelli, one of the Naval Academy's wrestling coaches. I met Coach Antonelli the previous fall. My parents were interested in a number of private college preparatory schools in New Jersey, and one of those schools was Lawrenceville High School. One a sunny autumn day, I headed down to Lawrenceville, New Jersey for an interview, accompanied by all of my family. My parents obviously were there, but my two sisters took a day off from their respective job and came along. I do not particularly recall that the entire family was required to be there for the interview. They insisted, however, that it was a family affair. This was not new to me - the entire family getting involved. So, there we were, all five of us, crammed into our family sedan for a nearly 2 hour drive down to Lawrenceville. On that day, Coach Antonelli interviewed me for admission to Lawrenceville. He was at that time an assistant admissions officer and also the head coach of Lawrenceville's wrestling team. I had participated in the local wrestling team while I was in middle school, which was indicated on my application to the school. Naturally, we discussed about wrestling and my plan to continue to compete in whichever school I would attend. Coach Antonelli then invited me and family to a wrestling match that was scheduled for later that day at the school. He suggested that we take a tour of the town, grab lunch and come back that afternoon to see the Lawrenceville wrestling team compete against one of the local schools. Again, all five of us, came back to Lawrenceville for the evening wrestling match and had a chance to meet and speak to the members of the wrestling team.
I was not accepted to attend Lawrenceville. On that day, however, I met one of the greatest mentors of my life thus far in my life. Coach Antonelli continued to have contact with my parents after the interview, and he invited to a number of various wrestling events that may be helpful for me. The most significant is Naval Academy's SEAL Training Camp for wrestling. It turned out, Coach Antonelli is a graduate of the Naval Academy. He himself was a member of the Naval Academy wrestling team and he has been involved in the wrestling summer program for a long time. Coach Antonelli eventually returned to the Naval Academy as an Assistant Admissions Director and also as an Assistant Coach for the school's wrestling team. Throughout my application process, Coach Antonelli gave me and my family valuable advice, guidance and support.
The SEAL Training Camp is an intense one week summer camp at Naval Academy's Annapolis campus. The camp is about testing and pushing one's limit as much as learning wrestling techniques. The description of the camp on the Naval Academy's official website describes it as an intense wrestling camp that will push you beyond your self-imposed limit. And, boy, was I pushed. The SEAL Camp was the most intense and challenging week of my life to that point. Each day consisted of hours of intense training and wrestling practice. A few campers left after the first couple of days. Every night, feeling exhausted and overwhelmed, I told myself that I would quit and call my parents the next day. It was only a summer camp, right? But I knew that it wasn't just a summer camp. It meant quitting something that I started. Then, each morning, I took a deep breath, prayed to God to give me the determination and strength to try for one more day. The training did not get any less rigorous as the days went by, but I knew that I could take one day at a time with the ultimate goal in mind of finishing the program. On the last day of the camp, as I was leaving Annapolis feeling stronger and proud, I realized that there is nothing I cannot do with determination and perseverance, and I knew it was in God's grace that he bestowed upon me that determination, perseverance and strength. I went back to the SEAL Camp two years after.
After my first summer experience at the Naval Academy SEAL Camp, I knew I would pursue entering the Naval Academy for college education. I began my application process during my sophomore year of high school and this was no easy task. The process of applying for the Naval Academy was arduous as it seemed tedious at time. In addition to the usual requirement of all top-ranked colleges for strong academics and stellar extracurricular community service records, the Naval Academy also required physical fitness. My days were packed with SAT prep classes, wrestling practices and other after school activities. The Naval Academy, as other service academies, also requires a nomination from the applicant's home state senator, congressman or other qualified political figures. Receiving a nomination was a separate application process itself, requiring putting together application packages similar to college application including school records, recommendations and essays. This entire process, from preparing and completion was spread over a course of two years, finally receiving an acceptance letter in the Spring of my senior year.
With the intimidating amount of work required for the application, I became disheartened by the progressively self-revealing possibility that I may not be accepted into the Academy. From daunting interviews to the monotony of answering application questions, by fall of my junior year, I was not only exhausted and aggravated, but I had lost the passion for entering the school. What's more, to be honest, my academic records and credentials were not as stellar as the Academy required or as indicated on college acceptance statistics. After all, this is the Naval Academy with the acceptance rate in a single-digit. My mother would love to tell the story how a counselor had told her point-blank that she was crazy to think that I had any realistic chance of going to the Naval Academy with my academic records. It was at one of those SAT prep programs popular in Korean-American communities. Getting nervous about my SATs, my mother had signed me up for Saturday sessions at this particular place, which I will leave it unnamed. The head of the program had known my sisters who graduated from Boston College and Brandeis College. When my mother approached him and mentioned that I had an aspiration to go to the Naval Academy, he responded, Mrs. Yoo, Brian is not on the same track as his sisters were; the Naval Academy is not a place where they take everyone who wants to go. Or something to that effect. That is what I was up against. The reality, as others saw it.
During the course of this time, I became deeply involved with my church, New Jersey Presbyterian Church. I had been attending church since I was a baby, but I often thought my relationship with God was not that strong or that special. Most of the time, I felt that I was just there because my parents brought me there every Sunday. I must admit, I sometime felt that my involvement at church was simply a great way to earn my extracurricular or community service activity hours. But, then, God reached out to me in the most mysterious way during the summer before my senior year in high school. During that summer, I went on a mission trip to Brazil with my church. It wasn't my first mission trip and it wasn't my first time out of the country. I was tired from school, college application and activities. In a way, I was just going through another motion in my life. For reasons I would never be able to tell, however, upon my return from the trip, I felt God's presence. Some people see God's visions in their dreams. Some people hear God's voice. In my case, God just reached out his hand'.and whacked me on my head. God whacked me on my head with an overwhelming feeling similar to what you feel when you are asked why you did something that you knew was wrong. Is that feeling remorse? Repentance? I wasn't sure. I felt that God was saying to me, Why are you so discouraged about something that you haven't even tried yet? Have you even asked me for it? Have I not given you what you need? I heard Matthew 7:7 - ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.
God works with each and every one of us in a special unique way. With me, through the consistency of growing up in church, without a fanfare, without a pounding knock, God simply had been with me my entire life since I was in my mother's womb. I just finally realized that summer that God has blessed me with everything that I need to pursue what I wanted in life. I began my senior year in high school invigorated than ever. I had the most amazing and supportive parents and two sisters who think that they qualify as 'parents' because they are much older than I am - essential making me having three mothers. Being involved in competitive sports my entire life, I had acquired a strong distaste of defeat. With my inherent refusal to lose along with my rejuvenated faith, I refused to give up. I geared up for my last SAT in the fall, continued with my physical training and put in all my efforts in school work.
When all the applications were sent out and all there was left to do was to wait, I knew that I had done everything that I could. I also knew that whatever outcome is what God wanted for me. Then, the acceptance letter came, enclosed in a leather binder. My parents showed tears of joy. I was overwhelmed with the sense of accomplishment and relief. After I received my acceptance letter, I began thinking about my near future at the Naval Academy and a life in the military. Unavoidably, this led me to wonder how hard my new life was going to be. I suddenly became tangled in a web of doubts uncertain that I would be able to live such a rigorous military life, let alone demanding four years at the Naval Academy. Then, one day, God whacked me in the head again. I was struck by a sense of motivation. Though I cannot remember exactly what my mother was doing, I just remember her doing one of her daily chores. Seeing her right there and then, I realized how much love and effort she had poured into everything in my life. This led me to reflect about my family and how much they do for me as well as how much they meant to me. The fact and thought that my family had helped me get that far in my life was so empowering that it instilled in me a profound sense of inspiration. My family was my inspiration and their well-being became my motivation to work hard. As a member of the U.S. Navy, I will be protecting them and all families in this country. I cannot count the number of times this same thought helped me overcome the grueling life and training at the Naval Academy thus far. Even when my body feels like it can move no further or when my mind can no longer hold focus, I think about my family and the blessings that God has bestowed upon me.
Non-believers may call it luck or coincident. I know that it is God's deliberate planning, designing and blessing that gave me those opportune moments, people and skills throughout my life. If anyone asks me, why you, why are you so special and why has God answered your prayer and not mine, I don't have the answer and I don't think anyone would ever have the answer. How would a human ever understand God's mind? In fact, I would have asked the same question when I was not accepted to Lawrenceville years ago. But, I know now that what I think is the best for me may not be what God has in store for me. I am ready and willing to accept to go where God sends me, having faith that God will give me everything that I need to walk down that path and to reach the destination that he has planned for me.